SHORT: Masturbation Gone Wrong

READERS: Boots Raingear, John, Acierocolotl, Kumquatxop, STOG, Portaxx, Victor Laszlo, and Lemon.

Recorded by Boots Raingear, edited by Portaxx

In this outtake from episode 47 (In The World of Dragon Dildos, Is The Chin Wattle Man King?), we come across a thread where Bad Dragon customers freely discuss the times that their masturbation routines went unexpectedly. Absolute horror ensues.

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CONTENT READ

  1. Masturbation Gone Wrong

NOTE: Since recording this episode, it seems that Bad Dragon disallowed guests from viewing the forums, meaning you can only view the content if you log in. So, sorry and/or you're welcome, I guess.

Last Updated on Wednesday, 28 September 2011 09:20  

Comments   

 
0 #20 oh6 2011-12-14 06:39
I'm just wondering what that "lollipop - badoop-boop" bit was about.
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+3 #19 Reginald Charming 2011-10-03 22:09
The best part was when Victor read the John F. Kennedy quote after all that talk about cum lube gallon kits.
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+1 #18 Portaxx 2011-10-03 21:50
Quoting Yay Victor!:
I was a part of this one but apparently I had blocked it completely out of my mind. I hope I find a way to block it out again.


You should really re-listen to yourself telling us all about gallon milk jugs full of dragon cum
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+3 #17 Yay Victor! 2011-10-03 21:30
I was a part of this one but apparently I had blocked it completely out of my mind. I hope I find a way to block it out again.
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+1 #16 PORTAXX 2011-10-03 00:56
Quoting bd:

There's only one thing to truly show gratitude for her effort. The Ridiculist has to go in to get her the fanciest dragon-dong possible, then take it and get it gold plated and *ahem* mounted so it's suitable for display in her home. It'll be a conversation starter!


I DO NOT LIKE THIS IDEA DDD8
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0 #15 bd 2011-09-30 11:02
Quoting BootsRaingear:
Portaxx was the only one of us brave enough to gather the material for the episode, and she deserves a fucking medal.


There's only one thing to truly show gratitude for her effort. The Ridiculist has to go in to get her the fanciest dragon-dong possible, then take it and get it gold plated and *ahem* mounted so it's suitable for display in her home. It'll be a conversation starter!
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+1 #14 Zorzark 2011-09-30 01:25
Quoting Anon:
OH MY FUCKING GOD I FOUND ANOTHER PAGE AND SOMEONE ATE OUT A HORSE

I quit.



Don't tell me that they were being praised for this. They were being applauded and internet high five'd for this, weren't they? Oh god why
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+1 #13 Notm 2011-09-30 00:44
Welp, I'm gonna need myself a tissue to deal with the spit on my laptop screen when I hear:
Super Smash Sex and
It's not a chew toy.

Dragon Dildos: Giving you heartburning pleasure.
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+1 #12 PORTAXX 2011-09-29 18:06
Quoting Anon:
OH MY FUCKING GOD I FOUND ANOTHER PAGE AND SOMEONE ATE OUT A HORSE

I quit.


Yeeeeep that was what broke me when looking up this shit 8( That and of course all the inlined photos of everyone using their dragon dildos. But mostly the actual bestiality. YAY ANIMAL ABUSE!

....

>:(
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+4 #11 Lady Frenzy 2011-09-29 13:30
Here's the archive.org cache of the thread, for those brave enough.

web.archive.org/.../...
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+2 #10 montrith 2011-09-29 12:30
A great person once said "Fresh nightmare fuel? Thanks, I was running kind of low". Pretty much sums up my feelings. I actually had to put on headphones for this one just to protect my reputation and innocent bystanders.
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+1 #9 PurpleXVI 2011-09-29 12:10
References to In the Mouth of Madness. That automatically makes this a favourite episode, even though it's a cut content ep.
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+1 #8 Anon 2011-09-29 06:09
OH MY FUCKING GOD I FOUND ANOTHER PAGE AND SOMEONE ATE OUT A HORSE

I quit.
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+3 #7 Anon 2011-09-29 05:52
Ran a quick Google search and "Masturbation Gone Wrong" was deleted. The only remaining evidence of it is a cached page, but there was only one good story on it.

So now I'm sharing it with you!

Quote:
The only bad one that comes to mind was in the shower. I had ordered a dildo a few weeks back and had the bathroom to myself, so I snuck it in with me. Now I didn't have the right lube for it, so I didn't plan to actually take the dildo, just rub it around back there teasing myself. I got a little more adventurous and started just pressing the tip firmly against my hole. Well apparently I don't give myself enough credit for how fast I stretch, because I slipped a bit and my ass ended up taking the whole unlubed dildo. I was nearly in tears and had to stifle a scream that would let everyone know that something was up in the bathroom. I went back to my room later rubbing my butt and thinking "never again." I laugh now though, but ouch that really hurt.
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+2 #6 PORTAXX 2011-09-29 04:20
Quoting Zorzark:
I really have to wonder why NOW they decide to hide their forums. They were public for years; they clearly didn't mind that strangers would be reading their reviews and seeing their... demonstrations.


I wouldn't be surprised if they hid the forums upon finding out we did an episode on them. Yeah, that might be kind of egocentric, but it's not too far-fetched. Furries/otherki n have a long history of hiding their journals and forums after someone makes fun of them, after all.

Either that, or minors kept trying to join the forums and they finally decided to do something about it.
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+5 #5 Zorzark 2011-09-29 04:07
I really have to wonder why NOW they decide to hide their forums. They were public for years; they clearly didn't mind that strangers would be reading their reviews and seeing their... demonstrations.
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+3 #4 Anon 2011-09-28 22:17
I still haven't managed to forget the bathroom blowjob or pooping out eggs videos I mentioned back then. :(
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+6 #3 BootsRaingear 2011-09-28 18:53
You'd feel much dirtier if you snooped around there a bit before deleting. My first attempt at mining Bad Dragon brought be to the threads where people posted reviews with action images/videos. There is no end of horror.

Portaxx was the only one of us brave enough to gather the material for the episode, and she deserves a fucking medal.
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+3 #2 Navigator 2011-09-28 17:12
If you'll believe it, I actually made an account there (god help me) to get to that thread. Even after I registered, it said I "didn't have permission" to view that thread. I guess I should be thankful for that. Probably the shortest amount of time I ever had an account somewhere before deleting it. I feel dirty, somehow.
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+6 #1 Geremy Tibbles 2011-09-28 10:13
Oh fuck.
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