A San Francisco Podcast

READERS: Lemon, Boots Raingear, Jack Chick, Kumquatxop, and Happy Ending.

Edited by Boots Raingear

Content for this episode was gathered by Lemon and Boots, with a little help from Montrith.

Pictured above: Bowls of Carrot Noodles with “Peanut” Sauce and a Dorito Sandwich (For Kids). Click for larger view.

LIVE from the home of Zynga, it's The F Plus Podcast! When Lemon and Boots visited The City By The Bay, they felt it was perfectly appropriate to sample the culinary traditions of such a vibrant and exciting city. Then, after eating some really good tacos, they made some raw food garbage based on recipes they found on the internet. Have you ever wanted to know what raw vegetable makes a perfect substitute for linguine? Or how changing the color of your salt can improve your chakra? Of course not, because you're not an idiot. This week, The F Plus plays the crunch twice for good measure.

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MUSIC USED
  1. Ol' Dirty Bastard - Shimmy Shimmy Ya
  2. Busta Rhymes - Everything Remains Raw
  3. Lady - Twerk
  4. Ween - Where'd The Cheese Go?
Last Updated on Thursday, 27 June 2013 19:01  

Comments   

 
+3 #35 sku 2013-09-04 23:23
Quoting A Meat:
Quoting Grygor:
Also, I love how they brag about the purity of their pink Himalayan salt, when the pink color is because of impurities.


Just go and roll your Himalayan pink salt in dirt. Its aura will be significantly purer.


as you should with ALL crystals if you listened to that old episode
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+4 #34 A Meat 2013-09-04 08:05
Quoting Grygor:
Also, I love how they brag about the purity of their pink Himalayan salt, when the pink color is because of impurities.


Just go and roll your Himalayan pink salt in dirt. Its aura will be significantly purer.
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+5 #33 I SHOP AT WHOLE FOOD 2013-09-03 16:20
Quoting Grygor:
Also, I love how they brag about the purity of their pink Himalayan salt, when the pink color is because of impurities.

The impurities are what make it pure. Like, from nature, and stuff. If they took those impurities out it would be processed, which is the least pure and natural thing food can be. Do you realize how many enemas you would need to flush out the toxins from regular table salt?
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+8 #32 Grygor 2013-09-02 16:18
Also, I love how they brag about the purity of their pink Himalayan salt, when the pink color is because of impurities.
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+1 #31 Les Min 2013-06-25 10:36
Quoting Grondothitus:
How is there only one entry for "put that shit in a bowl." I'm CERTAIN that was in the other cooking episodes.

Good catch. The actual tag is called "put all that shit in a bowl". Fixed now.
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+4 #30 Grondothitus 2013-06-24 22:33
How is there only one entry for "put that shit in a bowl." I'm CERTAIN that was in the other cooking episodes.
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+2 #29 VAE 2013-06-21 15:40
Quoting Whole Spews:
Irish Moss is like regular moss, but it's soaked in Baileys.

Is the Baileys made with coffee powder?
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+3 #28 RAW VEGAN FUCK PARTY 2013-06-21 10:35
Fun fact about mayonnaise cake: it's also sometimes referred to as "emergency cake", which supposedly derives from it's use as a last minute baked good for company when there were no eggs in the house. Leave it to the south I guess.
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+3 #27 September 2013-06-20 22:58
So, will you update us when half of you are dead from the complications that undoubtedly arose after ingesting that horrific vegetable medley?
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+1 #26 BAILEYS! 2013-06-20 18:22 Quote | This is spam.
 
 
+14 #25 KingKalamari 2013-06-20 18:15
This is only tangentially related but I wanted to tell everyone the story behind the song that closed the podcast: "Where'd the Cheese Go".

This was a song written by the band Ween as a jingle for a Pizza Hut commercial and this was one of the six tracks the band wrote for them. The people at Pizza Hut hated all the jingles the band came up with, none of them being "edgy" enough for them, and told the Brothers Ween to redo the whole thing.

Dean and Gene Ween returned to the studio and promptly recorded and submitted "Bitch, Where'd the Motherfuckin' Cheese Go At" a song that was pretty much identical to "Where'd the Cheese Go?" but with more obscenities.

Pizza Hut promptly dropped them from the project.

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+1 #24 Epstein 2013-06-20 10:50
Carrot noodles with "peanut" sauce, the real San Francisco treat!
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+15 #23 AlbieQuirky 2013-06-19 16:06
I remember going to a raw food restaurant for a business lunch. I ordered a salad, reasoning that salad is supposed to be raw so how terrible could it be? This one lady, basically Lucille Bluth from "Arrested Development", orders soup.

Her soup comes, and she's all o_O and asks the waiter why it's not hot. He painstakingly explains the raw food philosophy (dump shit in a blender, wait, I mean, preserve the food's vital essence) and she hears him out.

Then she says, in a chilly old rich-lady voice, "So how is this even soup? If you'd said on the menu that it was cold vegetable sludge, I would have ordered something else. But I thought it would be actual soup."
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+3 #22 Sun Smasher 2013-06-19 09:26
You know, I really wish there was a video of the eating process. I would've LOVED to see the expressions...
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+13 #21 Whole Spews 2013-06-18 22:45
Irish Moss is like regular moss, but it's soaked in Baileys.
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+2 #20 KingKalamari 2013-06-18 22:05
Dump, Dump, Dump had better become a tag...
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+1 #19 Evaxis 2013-06-18 21:55
The irish moss was easily the best part though.
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0 #18 Evaxis 2013-06-18 21:53
Not gonna lie, when I heard the Doritos sandwich recipe I didn't understand why it was in the material until I heard the butter, as my brothers and I have been adding Doritos to sandwiches since we were little kids >_>

But oh god the reactions to the actual food were so great
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0 #17 sku 2013-06-18 20:44
see, sometimes i kinda resent the fact that i live in new england, specifically the non-massachuset ts part of new england, since i do like to try new things and there just aren't many avenues for trying things that aren't, say, pasta or McDonalds--ther e just aren't enough foreign food markets out in the open and it's disheartening for somebody who wants to find neat and weird stuff to try at least once

on the other hand, i'm glad this stuff is so hard to find because it prevents this exact shit from happening
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+1 #16 Max Headroom 2013-06-18 20:29
That reminds me of my favorite thing ever, Doritos consomme!: www.youtube.com/.../

And yes, we need a Canada episode.
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+5 #15 Portals 2013-06-18 13:03
Another bay area native here! I'd have to put the raw food diet just above breatharianism and just below paleo in terms of stupidity.
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+9 #14 Grigori 2013-06-18 12:42
"The temperature has dropped and soup weather is here" so let's make raw soup? What the fuck is going on here?
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+1 #13 A Meat 2013-06-18 09:34
You know, I'm kinda happy all these raw food maniacs are also vegetarian, because I know they'd be unwise enough to eat raw pork no matter how many people warn them.
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+1 #12 VAE 2013-06-18 08:03
This was hillarious; that said, as someone from the hungarian border, the desecration of goulash fills me with boiling, searing, steaming anger that must surely horrify all the raw food advocates by the virtue of using heat x3
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+12 #11 BootsRaingear 2013-06-18 06:28
Quoting Reginald Charming:
After the Lady song, I checked my audio player to see how much time was left, and thanks to my butterfingers, I somehow got the podcast to play the rest of it at half-speed.

Other than that, fantastic episode!


Stog slips on a pile of chocolate bars and SLOWS DOWN TIME.

Somebody write that story.
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+6 #10 Reginald Charming 2013-06-18 04:20
After the Lady song, I checked my audio player to see how much time was left, and thanks to my butterfingers, I somehow got the podcast to play the rest of it at half-speed. So I pretended I was listening to a Dorito Sandwich party gone bad and was on my edge wondering who was going to let out a primal scream and pull out the gun taped under the desk.

Other than that, fantastic episode!
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0 #9 MicroMissles 2013-06-18 02:21
This was a fantastic episode. Now I have more recipes to add to my "things to record myself eating" list. This episode was a lot more -raw- than previous ones.
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+1 #8 Ashto 2013-06-18 01:14
Jesus, I'm pretty sure this is easily the best material you guys have recorded thus far. Something about the live recording session just seems perfect, hopefully there'll be more like this down the road!
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+4 #7 noname 2013-06-17 23:19
FYI, irish moss is an algae, kind of like agar, and is usually prepared by boiling it up with some water and sugar then straining it to make a gelatin. I have no fucking clue what happens if you just blend it.
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+10 #6 RoeCocoa 2013-06-17 22:29
As a Bay Area native, the friend of a recovering raw food hippie*, and the daughter of a budding agave-juice-and -overpriced-sal ts-enthusiast, I feel qualified to declare this The Perfect F+ Episode.

* That reminds me, I need to get busy assembling a submission document about naturopathic "medicine."
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