The F Plus

Do you want to be a guest reader on The F Plus? Well, now’s your chance, pal. This is The F Plus’ Race For Ridiculism.

THE SHORT VERSION

To enter, we need you to provide us with an episode’s worth of material, as well as a short (2 to 3 minute) MP3 of you reading a selection from that material. If we like your content and you don’t sound like Basil Marceux, then you’re ready for The Big Time. You get to spend an evening mocking other people with half a dozen other judgemental nerds who take great joy in such things, plus Lemon will send you some sort of prize.

The Race Concludes Friday, April 6th when a winner will be announced and somebody will be made slightly more e-famous than they were when they started. To enter, e-mail all your content to This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it , and multiple winners may be selected, depending on how this whole thing shakes out.

THE LONGER VERSION

Over the past couple months, I’ve received quite a few e-mails from people asking if they could be guest readers on a future episode on The F Plus. Also, looking through our submissions, we’ve received some pieces of really excellent content, but in a lot of cases they’ve been isolated bits, and we haven’t been able to make them work in a larger episode theme.

So the Race For Ridiculism should address both these issues, and people like contests anyway, don’t they? Let’s do some Q&A...

Q: What do you need?

1. You need to provide us with a full episode’s worth of material. That means something that it’ll take about an hour and a half for us to read through (with our usual asides), as we typically record for two hours. Ideally all the content you put together should have some sort of theme to it. I’m assuming if you’re reading this you’ve heard what F Plus material usually sounds like, so I shouldn’t need to explain it any further. Put these together in a document of your choosing (Google Documents, word doc, body of an e-mail, whatever you like) including both links and the actual text of the content to be read, and send all that along to This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .
2. In addition to your content, we’ll also need a short (somewhere from 2 to 3 minutes) MP3 of you reading a selection from that content. Honestly, we just want to know what you sound like. Send that to the same e-mail address.

We record our episodes at 9PM central on the weekends, the day of recording changing somewhat depending on availability. We do it all through Skype and you’ll need either a headset or a combination of microphone and headphones.

Q: What do I get?

1. You get to count yourself among a select group of people who call themselves F Plus Ridiculists. This means you’ll get to spend an evening with half a dozen other miscreants who judge each other as harshly as we judge our subjects. This is probably more pleasant than it sounds.

2. You’ll get to have your voice heard by the couple thousand people who listen to The F Plus on a regular basis. How many listeners exactly? Well, the exact number is somewhere between the population of Des Moines, IA and the population of Strawberry Point, IA. I’m afraid we can’t be more specific than that.
3. A listing on our Ridiculists page, alongside Burlesque superstar Ophelia Flame and America’s first Real Doll repairman, Lou Fernandez. Also if you’ve got something to promote, we’ll put a word in.
4. Lemon will send you somethingorother. To be honest, he’s not sure what he’s going to send out yet, but it should be a fairly interesting memento of your time when you yelled at the internet with the rest of us.
5. You'll just get lover like any other, that's what you get.

Q: What sort of content should I try to find?

If you’ve listened to the F Plus, you should have a fairly good idea of the kind of stuff we’re looking for: Fetishists, weird subcultures, conspiracy theorists, forums where everyone is an idiot, poorly written stories, deluded egomaniacs... it might be difficult to show us something that we haven’t seen before, but try to get something that might be new to some of our listeners. Your theme can be tenuous if needed, but there should be an overall concept tying all the material together.

Anything we haven’t already read is fair game. If there’s stuff that you’ve submitted but we haven’t gotten to it yet, find more of that and send it in.

Okay, that’s enough text.

Damn right it is. Any other questions you can leave in the comments. You’ve got a couple weeks before Friday April 6th, but I’d recommend you get started now.

C’mon, now. Open a new tab, fer chrissakes.