WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange taught us a couple things about the world we live in. Firstly, it turns out that Steve Martin's hair may actually just be that color. But only slightly less shocking is the relevation that our government is keeping secrets from us. Millions of secrets! And yeah, some of them might involve the United States bombing our own journalists, but the folks at Above Top Secret have unraveled even deeper mysteries. Did you know that you can jump higher during the night time? It's true! Just don't bother testing that empirically because the Government will probably falsify your records. This week, The F Plus is breaking the laws of thermodynamics.
For years now, you've been listening to The F Plus and wondering one thing: When are you fuckers going to produce some cheap schwag that I can buy, so all my nerd friends know which one of us is the raddest (and that it's me, if I haven't made that clear).
Well, first of all, you should really construct your thoughts a little better. I mean, that was a whole bunch of text, and it started out as a question, but then it didn't even have a question mark at the end. Poor form, bro. Oh, but if you've been waiting for the day when we'd sell some shit to you, today is that day.
We just printed a very, very small run of F+ mousepads, and as of this posting, there are only 13 available. If there's a huge demand, we'll do another pressing of this design, but that's definitely not assured so buy this thing right now before you allow your brain time to think it over.
These mousepads are 9"x7.5", rubbber-backed with a cloth top. And on that cloth-top, a 1960's comic book style advertisement for a Malatoran Robot Body (ep #69), a bottle of Balloon Juice (ep #24) and you very own limited edition Gamers Hip Clip (ep #59). The drawings were lovingly crafted by Portaxx, the layout and ad copy was drunkenly thrown together by Lemon.
Oh, I suppose you want PICTURES, doncha? Fine. But I feel it spoils the surprise.
We're giving these things for 9 bucks, shipping included within the United States. If you don't live inside the United States, I might ask you to kick another two bucks in, just to make up for the shipping cost.
Okay, that's enough talk! BUY THE THING!
Took about 3 hours, so thanks to all of you who snatched these up.
For the rest of you, if you're still interested, let us know. We might do another series of 'em. Maybe.
An independant artist and Jell-O spokeswoman once said "love is a battlefield". She then said "love is a battlefield" many more times, because it was part of the chorus of her hit single, and if you don't sing the hits, the guys that run the state fairs don't give you the money. Anyway, what was I saying? Oh yes, love. It's a difficult topic, fraught with pain, heartbreak and uncertainty. Just because you love someone, does that mean she'll love you back? Well, if the object of your affection is a fictional cartoon character, the answer is always no, and among Otaku, that means yes. We're reading the thoughts of people in love with cartoon characters, and their love is just as real as their love for their last girlfriend. You don't know her. She lives in Canada. This week, The F Plus gets a busy signal trying to call the 3-D Police Department.
Irregular is a whole new podcast concept we've been working on for a little while, and we hope you're as pleased with the result as we are currently.
Differing from The F Plus, the idea behind Irregular is to actually have subjects on the show, and to have a conversation with them about what makes them who they are. This is very much a side project which won't be done as often as The F Plus, but it's a concept we're excited about and based on the strength of our first episode, we're hoping to make some more of these.
Irregular has its own website as well as its own RSS Feed, so people subscribed to The F Plus won't be automatically downloading episodes of Irregular or vice versa, but we will be posting updates on this site when new episodes are out.
In the first Irregular episode, we have a lively discussion with three very different Kindleporn authors. There's Jessi Bond, Francis Ashe and a secret guest who wishes to remain nameless for reasons that will become obvious fairly quickly into the episode.
We spend about an hour and a half talking about the business of erotica publishing, the inspiration necessary for writing stories about vampires having sex with their stepfathers, and the sideways efforts of censorship.
For man to be truly aware of himself, he must explore his own mind. To examine your own thoughts, wants and failures and growing on the things you've learned is the way to thrive; to be a member of an evolving species who looks toward the horizon and takes a step forward. But what of dreams, those manifestations of your subconscious that you cannot seize control of? With an expression so disjointed and free of rational throught, can a dream really ever be understood? Well, if you're a member of dreammoods.com, sure! All you gotta do is start typing. This week, The F Plus is just waiting for Varzandeh to show up.
Popular media seems to get no end of pleasure in exploring the day to day drudgery of characters who belong in a comic book universe. For those superheroes and supervillians, their life is so absurd that there is very little relatability of those characters to people living in the real world. But then thanks to online RPGs like City of Heroes and Champions Online, anyone with an internet connection and a love for paying fees can create their own superhero and live in a world populated exclusively by other characters who also have stupid skillsets. For the first of our Race For Ridiculism Showcase Episodes, Cleretic will be bringing us to this world, and forgetting to pack enough moist towelettes. This week, buy one glimp and get one free!
BIOS READ, IN ORDERCHAMPIONS ONLINE
CITY OF HEROES
Sing Sang Song
Vivian (Champions Online)
Death Bolt Johnny
Naughty Lil Succubi
NOTE: for City of Heroes, Cleretic found these bios in-game, thus convenient weblinks are not available. However, you can see the document with all the bios we read, plus a couple more fun ones that didn't make it in.
Respected authors and lifelong readers hold differing opinion on the benefits of the kindle. While some bemoan the loss of the tactile pleasures of a good novel, others feel an e-book is a purer manifestation of the written word. Of course, their debate is an irrelevancy. Human society never backs away from a technology for romantic reasons and those who want to do so are usually being nostalgic just because they enjoy being nostalgic. Plus, most people are just reading porn on those things anyway. This week, The F Plus tries to return our inflatable dog.
The F Plus Race For Ridiculism concluded on Friday and as mentioned, we couldn't be more pleased with the results. Quite a lot of people went out and hunted down quite a lot of really great content, and that's gonna mean some excellent episodes on the horizon.
We want to make sure to give congratulations to JT, Cleretic, Cheapskate and Montrith - who were victorious in finding some of the worst things the internet had to offer, and so will receive the dubious honor of being part of a podcast in the near future. We're keeping the topics all secret at the moment, but this is all gonna be really fun to read.
Meanwhile, there's an additional squad of people who found a whole different batch of stuff for us to read, so our content is set for the next couple of months, and really, giving ourselves a break from mining strange fetish sites is our prize.
Feel free to use this comments section to brag about your successes, or call other people cheaters for winning.
Hoosier biologist and unbelievable superpervert Alfred Kinsey believed that human sexual proclivities could all be charted on a seven point scale, from fully hetero to fully homo. Further, he attested that the majority of the species drifted towards the middle - in a grey area between gay and straight. But there's an oft-forgotten classification in this scale of sexuality, and that is for people who are completely dismissive of the whole affair altogether. I'm talking about the asexuals: people so unconcerned with sexual pursuits that they are free to spend their time more wisely, like telling the internet how unconcerned they are with sexual pursuits. This week, The F Plus doesn't even know what you're talking about. No really!
NOTE: Lemon apologizes in advance for his microphone during this episode. It was fucked up and I didn't realize it until we were done recording.
ACE SECRETS, where you can learn the true horrors of living inside the asexual closet.
And finally, Portaxx really wants to find some Non-Consensual Furniture Rearrangement Erotica. So, if anyone comes across any (or feels like writing some) I know it would fulfill a desire she's had for years.